16 February 2008

Global Warming

At the risk of alienating most of my loyal readers up north, I thought I would tell you what Global Warming is doing to Paradise.

While New York, Cleveland, Chicago, and places on the same latitudinal stripe, are now experiencing freezing temperatures, sleet, and the whole "winter wonderland" shtick, Al Gore has struck a mean blow to us tropical islanders as well. There can be no doubt that nature is offended by his Nobel, and is determined to make Global Warming Gore look every bit as foolish as Democratic Candidate Gore looked when not only did he fail to carry his home state, but his deadly efficient campaign team managed to have thousands of aged Jewish Floridians vote for a man who described the State of Israel as "a strategic albatross draped around the neck of the United States" and of whom his mentor, William Buckley wrote, "I find is impossible to defend Pat Buchanan against the charge" of anti-Semitism.

The result, of course, was the election of DubyaTheStupid. Put aside the re-count fiasco, the disgraceful decision of the Supreme Court, the litigation, the whole ugly mess. In the end, it was Al Gore who brought us DTS.

So what has Mother Nature wrought to shame Al and make us all smirk at his recently acquired title as Global Warming maven? It may be Global, but I see no Warming: it has been COLD here for a month. I'm talking nighttime temperatures in the HIGH SIXTIES, long sleeve shirts, chinos at night instead of shorts, the whole bit. Mind you, we still sit on the beach during the day and bake in the sun, but it is not gotta-go-in-the-water-every-fifteen-minutes hot. It's just plain comfortable. Comfortable in the St. Barths sun? Sacrebleu!

And the winds are berserk. The so-called "vents de Noel", which are supposed to blow through here a week or ten days around Christmas time, have been blowing steadily through January and February. The blue waters of the Caribbean look like somebody dumped in a giant box of soap flakes. Lift the lid on your washing machine in the midst of your wash cycle, look in, and you'll know what the Caribbean Sea has looked like for a month now.

Our friends Susan and Jim Dubin came down here to sail on Bobby and Jim Aroncigs' stunning 100 foot sailboat this weekend. They were scheduled to board the yacht in St. Maarten, sail to St. Barths, anchor in the bay, and go sailing every day.

But though the boat was in St. Maarten on the day the Dubins and the Aroncigs arrived there, the captain strongly advised they fly here from St. Maarten. The channel separating these islands was beyond snotty; it was just plain ugly, with nine foot swells. Both couples flew in while the crew brought the boat across. All are now virtual prisoners on the boat. They spent one night at anchor in the very protected Columbier Bay, but they were rocking and rolling so severely, they came into the inner harbor the next morning and tied up to the quay. They did leave the dock to take C'est La Vie out for a sail yesterday and promptly after clearing the point found themselves in thirty knot winds, then encountered blinding rain squalls, and hurried back to port, their faces a touch greener than when they departed. So the Dubin's five day sailing trip morphed into two airplane flights and being tied to the dock for four days.

But shed no tears on their behalf. On Tuesday, the Aroncigs, Dubins, and Londons drank lots of good wine at a scene lunch at Nikki Beach, where had an interesting engineering discussion involving some almost-bathingsuit-tops, and on Thursday the six of us enjoyed an elegant dinner aboard the yacht. And Susan did some shopping damage as well. Mind you, this is still Paradise, and this is not an appeal for sympathy, but really, what's with this weather?

Personally, I am persuaded that Gore should give back that Nobel Peace Prize (Nobel Peace Prize? How ridiculous is that? Oh, well, why not? They gave one to Yasser Arafat.) Were he to surrender that ludicrous award, I am confident the wind would slack off, the rain would limit itself to nighttime only, the temps would get back to the mid seventies where they belong, and Hillary would concede to Barack. (Btw, doncha just love the latest Clinton Team Theme: "Sure, anybody could inspire the country and the rest of the world with words, but we choose not to!")?

So give back that Nobel prize, Al, or at least put it in your lockbox along with my social security. We need some real global warming, and I'd like it now, please.

A bientot.

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home