NO MORE MALE MASTURBATION IN MISSISSIPPI?
On February 25, 2024, I published a blog entitled “Coming Next.” It reported on a faux judicial decision coming out of the Texas Criminal Court of Appeals after a real Alabama appellate decision to the effect that injury to a frozen fertilized human egg in an IVF laboratory was injury to a person, “because God made every person in his image, and this is true of unborn human life no less than it is of all other human life. Even before birth, all human beings bear the image of God, and their lives cannot be destroyed without effacing his glory."
The principal part of the faux Texas appellate decision in my blog read:
"The Defendant was charged with murder. The court found the 24-year-old male was watching a television show that aroused his erotic impulses. He masturbated into a tissue that he ultimately flushed down the toilet … . His semen was every bit as important to the creation of God's image as a female egg. His gamete included living cells, observable under a microscope swimming about. Each of the destroyed gametes included a full copy of a set of chromosomes that, when united with a female set of chromosomes… would have dictated the sex, skin, color, eye color, and thousands of characteristics that make up God's image. This defendant’s semen was a key ingredient to that image. It was every bit of a determinant of the characteristics of a resulting fertilized egg as was a female gamete. Accordingly, it follows, that the destruction of the defendant’s semen was as violative of God's will as the destruction of a fertilized or unfertilized female gamete.
Conclusion: This court sees neither logical nor religious distinction between the role of a male gamete or a female gamete, either before or after they come in contact with one another or whether the contact occurs in a uterus or a test tube."
In a concurring decision, a faux judge by the name of Thomas wrote, "I respectfully submit that our holding today that wilful destruction of a male (or female) gamete violates the laws of the state of Texas has an undeniable effect on virtually every form… of sexual activity.”
...
The blog was fun to write and was well received. To my surprise, two of my readers missed the sarcasm, and assumed I was making an accurate report of a real judicial decision. I was surprised. The conclusion reached by the faux court in my blog was clearly absurd.
Until yesterday!
This is real. A bill entitled “Contraception Begins at Erection Act" has been introduced in the Mississippi legislature. The bill would make it unlawful for "a person to discharge genetic material without the intent to fertilize an embryo. The fine is $1,000 for a first offense, $5,000 for a second offense, and $10,000 for each subsequent offense. The bill clearly fixates on masturbation because it excludes semen discharges using contraception or for IVF purpses!
In a statement to NBC affiliate WLBT of Jackson, the legislator who proposed the bill issued the following stagement:
"All across the country, especially here in Mississippi, the vast majority of bills relating to contraception and/or abortion focus on the woman’s role when men are fifty percent of the equation," he wrote. "This bill highlights that fact and brings the man’s role into the conversation. People can get up in arms and call it absurd but I can’t say that bothers me."
Mississippi masturbaters beware!
A bientot.
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posted by marty at 2:49 PM
